24 Oct
You can now find me at http://missdiazepam.blogspot.com <3
Hope to see you there ^_^ It’s much easier for me to manage, especially for the graphic aspects, since I’m not exactely a computer master :P
And don’t forget http://missdiazepam.tumblr.com for my inspiration scrapbook! Or http://travellingfair.tumblr.com for travel photos.
See ya!
7 Oct
I’m planning to move soon…I need somewhere where I get more control over the graphic in a simpler way. This blog is really just a past time for me…and this place eats up too much time, with final results that I don’t even like that much! It’s kind of a loss-loss situation, uh?
I don’t like Google though. But I might just give it up. We’ll see soon.
23 Sep
Ghostworld
At my high school, it felt more to me
Like a jail cell, a penitentiary
My time spent there, it only made me see
That I don’t ever wanna be like you
I don’t wanna do the things you do
I’m never gonna hear the words you say
and I don’t ever wanna, I don’t ever wanna be
You…don’t wanna be just like you
(Good Charlotte-The Anthem)
Lately I’ve been feeling all “high-school-y”.
I blame this on some of the blogs I’m reading and tv I’m watching, and obviously the being in September, school month for antonomasia.
Mtv Italy has just discovered that geek is chic, and is airing a lot of new nerd-friendly stuff. The only one I’m finding lovely and therefore watching every week is the kind-of-fake-reality My life as Liz. Ah ah, she’s pretty cool. And the guy is reeeally cute. The kind of crush I would have had in high school myself.
Truth is, I haven’t been in any kind of organized educational institution for over an year now! I graduated from high school in Summer 2009 and haven’t gone back, yet.
Even though I quite like studying, I needed a break from it. One year wasn’t enough, so I’m entering the second. Because, yes, in my experience, high school sucks. Yup. It’s not a case that a couple of weeks ago I quoted Daria’s graduation speech. My high school experience was hell. I suffered, a lot, and it hurt all through it, every single year, in different ways. Like so many other people, I never had the the brilliant high school experience. Mine was gloomy, boring, heart breaking, embarassing, all in all just LAME!
Yes, my high school life was lame, that’s it! I was a real loser, the few friends I made were a disaster, I never really learnt anything in 4 years and didn’t leave any trace behind me.
So, don’t be fooled by all these stories of cool nerds, like the one I previously mentioned. They are fun and entertaining, but not realistic. Don’t feel guilty because you’re making nothing out of your school years, ok?! I mean, if you can have some full, satisfying years, all the best! I’m mad jealous ahah, but good for you J But remember that some people just cannot do it. For some people high school means hiding under a blanket, waiting for it to pass. If that’s your case, and everything you try fails (every club-team-association you try to join sucks, and so on), IT’S ALL RIGHT! It just means it’s not your time of life. Good times will come later. You’re building up good karma for college, or work, or a life of World wanderings.
Some might say I wasted my teenage years. I used to think it myself for a long time. But guess what? I DON’T GIVE A DAMN!
All I care about is that now I’m happier and stronger. I’m proud of myself for not being that “lame” teenager anymore. I realize I’ve never been lame or a loser, I was just in the wrong environment and as soon as I got out of it I could shine again!
So, UNLUCKY HIGH SCHOOLERS: HOLD ON! Don’t feel guilty for hating high school and not being able to make the best out of it. Sometimes it’s just not your place. But it’s over soon enough and then you’re free. Really. I promise.
Just make sure during and especially afterwards, you do anything you can to find your own happiness. In the worst case you’ll get somewhere in the middle. And it will be good.
Now, if I can advise some high-school-friendly media consumption: Stylerookie, Tavi Gevinson is my high school queen of the moment. Kurt Cobain-ish hair, granny glasses, this smart (not anymore so)little girl has grown really interesting. I’m not that interested in fashion and designer collections, but really do chek out her outfits. Posts about diverse aesthetics and feminism. And her inspiration posts where she just pastes a series of images. As I said, she’s pretty smart. The whole blog smells like teen spirit.
And watch Daria! Lots of it! Watch Ghostworld and cry for it. Watch the Virgin Suicides, or read the book. Read Harry Potter (but you don’t have to watch the films, or do it after the books). Read Stargirl. Cry when you feel like crying, every time, but then push the gloom away until next time and smile and shine for a while even if you’re alone. And let yourself feel better. Do it!
8 Sep
My sister got back two days ago from her holiday with her best friend in Florence. Today she got out of her luggage a pack of pasta she bought there. It’s multicoulored and the label says “Fantasy”, which means multiple colours AND multiple shapes. She eventually realized that half of it is penis shaped. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
8 Sep
Guess how I’ve been spending the last 3 days? Playing a broken guitar!
Ok, ok, “playing”? One step back.
Today marks almost a whole week home! And while I love being home and enjoying my finally well deserved holiday, I need ways to let my body and mind unwind and keep active. Which is why I’ve planned a few things to do to keep delighted.
Playing guitar is part of my Bucket List. I don’t have to do any of those things now, but playing guitar was the easiest and most immediately “doable”. And if it’s doable…why not? So, I decided to start trying during these weeks!
A few months ago I suddendly had a clear epiphany and knew that I had to learn how to play. Does anybody remember the Icelandic volcanic eruption that paralized European skys for weeks? Well, I was in Berlin back then, and had just moved back to the hostel, in the middle of that madness. Stranded people can go weird, believe me. Anyway, one afternoon I found myself in the common room with three other people. For hours two of them made wonderful music. And suddendly all the anguish and the madness was gone for a while. Even more importantly, the sound coming from that guitar was so lovely I wanted to cry. Then I decided I wanted to be able to make something that beautiful myself, one day.
In the following months I listened to many other people playing and reinforcing my decision even more. Imagine my excitment when I remembered my mum actually owned a guitar! She hadn’t played it for ages, but it was probably still at home!
And it was. It is.
The chords are loose and old (impossible to tune properly), and super hard to my tender fingers, which feel like burnt all the time now. One chord is even completely missing, making it even funnier. But it’s a really good guitar (or so I’ve been told :P) and we’ll get over all this soon!
Now, honestly, I’ve never had any talent for music. I do have long fingers which will help me playing, but I’m totally uncoordinated and just don’t have a good ear!
But I don’t give a shoot!
I’m not playing to become the next worldwide famous rockstar or the next music genius!
I’m playing because I love it! Because I want to make something beautiful and please people who can listen! And just the thought makes me happy! :)
Eventually, when I’ll get over the first phases and produce something more than raucous noise/sound ahah! But at least for now my mum and sister are having fun laughing at me a bit. :)
Nothing has ever made me appreciate musicians and want to learn an instrument more than travelling. Street musicians are magic. And Berlin pullulated of them. Street performers are the only people to whom sometimes I happily give money, and never regret it.
5 Sep
“Um… thank you. I’m not much for public speaking, or much for speaking, or, come to think of it, much for the public. And I’m not very good at lying. So let me just say that, in my experience, high school sucks. If I had to do it all over again, I’d have started advanced placement classes in preschool so I could go from eighth grade straight to college. However, given the unalterable fact that high school sucks, I’d like to add that if you’re lucky enough to have a good friend and a family that cares, it doesn’t have to suck quite as much. Otherwise, my advice is: stand firm for what you believe in, until and unless logic and experience prove you wrong; remember, when the emperor looks naked, the emperor is naked; the truth and a lie are not “sort of the same thing”; and there is no aspect, no facet, no moment of life that can’t be improved with pizza. Thank you.”
1 Sep
Berlin and the hostel have given me much shit, but also lots of love…
Here is some of it:
31 Aug
There are certain, really annoying things that I’m never gonna miss from here. Actually I can’t wait not to have to do/say them EVER again. Yes, because in every house there are some tips and tricks to survival that you have to share with your flatmates. But imagine having to change these flatmates every few days. Now Imagine also that they aren’t really your flatmates, but that you work for them instead. Nerves will crack up, trust me.
Ps: I’m leaving in 36 hours !!! :)
I wanted to be a wandering genie. 